23 Jan 2012
Current Diet • Daily Life • Realizations

Grocery Shopping & An Update!

So, after several weeks of really unhealthy eating and a 5+ pound weight gain, I am putting myself back on a lighter eating plan for a while. I’ve also decided to stop trying to label myself as vegan or even vegetarian this year. Of course, my eventual goal is to eat a 100% plant-based diet. However, trying too hard has never helped me. In fact, it’s hindered me, over and over again. So I’m letting up on myself and practicing gratitude for everything I eat.

I cleaned my fridge out from top to bottom to give myself a fresh start. It turns out I had so many old expired things in there. For some reason I had four or five jars of low sodium/organic pasta sauce in the back. Rather amusing, since I rarely eat pasta! After cleaning out the fridge, I headed over to my favorite store, Whole Foods, and stocked up on produce and a few other things. This is what I got:

  • Organic apples (Jazz, Gala)
  • Organic peeled baby carrots
  • Celery
  • Locally-made hummus
  • Organic salad greens
  • Organic romaine lettuce
  • Organic soy yogurt
  • Organic light string cheese
  • Mini Baby Bel cheeses
  • Kashi ‘Simply Maize’ cereal
  • Gardein Herb Dijon Breasts (soy-based imitation meat)
  • Small prepared fresh fruit cups of strawberries, grapes and cantaloupe
  • Organic blueberries
  • Organic spinach

Yum! Adding to the things I already have in my pantry and freezer, plus the few things I left in the fridge (oatmeal, seeds, nuts, some vegan soups, beans, peas, brown rice, veggies, fish, Tofurkey slices, low carb wraps, etc) I’ll be able to put together some light and healthy snacks and meals. Fruits and veggies will be a major staple, obviously. For a while last year I was eating a lot of produce but over the past month or so, it’s been mostly a free-for-all of salty, high-fat foods.

I also have fresh squeezed (unpasteurized) green juice and organic carrot juice in my fridge, plus lemons and a few oranges. I’m taking supplements now – a liquid calcium/magnesium supplement, zinc, Vit D, and digestive enzymes. I love drinking a combo tea of dandelion root and peppermint (cleans the liver and kidneys) and green tea.

A good friend has a theory about eating so-called ‘junk food’ (I am working to move away from labels of all kinds this year, including labeling things good or bad!) when on a spiritual path. Both of us find that anytime we make progress spiritually – have new awakenings, realizations, healings, etc – that we tend to both crave and reach for foods we don’t really want to eat. Her theory is that it balances us out and grounds us. I agree, and have decided to get out in nature more to become grounded that way. We’ve been having a very mild winter here in Oklahoma. Today, for example, is supposed to be almost 60 degrees! So I’m going for a walk at a nearby park.

I didn’t share much on here or anywhere else about it, but from the end of November until just a week or so ago, I went through a really difficult time. I basically hit a rock bottom emotionally, mentally and sort of physically. It was the most difficult time of my life, however, some amazing things came out of it. During that time I hit new lows but also a few new spiritual highs. I won’t get into too many details, (someday I will share more candidly about what happened) but essentially, I had to become ‘broken’ and empty in order to be filled with new light. Since then, I have developed a much stronger connection with my inner intuition and those around me. After a month of literal isolation, this past week, I’ve begun going out and meeting up with people again, and it’s been amazing! In the space of just a few days I have made several new acquaintances and friends.

Out of my month of isolation has come tons of insights and ideas for healing, service to others and many other things. I’m no longer a student at the School of Metaphysics, so I have plenty of time and freedom to basically create lots of new things!

Anyway, I hope you all enjoy your Monday! I’m off to meditate then make some breakfast. :)

Rian | One comment | Tags: , , ,
31 Dec 2011
Daily Life

My Old Diet Blog & 2011 Recap

Earlier today I was struck with inspiration to read through some of my old diet blog, which I kept from 2007-2010! It is at this link, if anyone is interested in reading it: www.girlonadiet.com. I highly recommend it for any fans of my current blog, because it will show you where I have been and the kind of person I once was.

2011 has been an interesting year, to say the least! Viewing my old diary entries from 2007-2010, I am reminded that I’ve been on a journey to ‘health’ – or rather, ‘weight loss’, for about 5 years now. It is rather humbling to view things in that aspect.

I hope you all have a seriously wonderful and blessed 2012 celebration!!!

Rian | 4 comments | Tags: ,
24 Dec 2011
Breakfast • Food Picture Posts

Oatmeal & Happy Holidays!

I’ve been experimenting with oatmeal lately and throwing in all sorts of different things!

The above oatmeal has:

  • Mixed Himalayan berries (goji, blackberries, blueberries, etc)
  • raw pumpkin seeds
  • honey
  • cinnamon
  • organic banana

It was very delicious!

Anyway, I hope you all have a wonderful holiday!

Rian | 3 comments | Tags: , , , , , , ,
18 Dec 2011
Daily Life • Spiritual Eating

Purification & Food Intolerances

Hey all! A lot has gone on in the past few weeks… life has changed radically and I’ve gone through many ups and downs. Mostly a lot of downs which has led to a much higher ‘up’ than before. (When I say ‘up’, I mean new clarity and awareness). I’ve gone through a period where a lot of inner and outer purification has gone on (and it’s continuing), which has resulted in a lot of old emotions, mental programming, unhealthy beliefs and such being uncovered and dealt with. It was a very tumultuous time and I made some pretty unhealthy choices while going through it. I had what some might call a bit of a mental and emotional breakdown.

However, I have gotten through it to the other side. As a result, I’ve made some changes in my life. In addition to my usual daily meditation, concentration and visualization exercises, (on the suggestion of an enlightened spiritual teacher) I’ve added in some spiritual purifying rituals. One of them involves taking an hour-long bath every day (which I’m still easing into). I never realized before now that such long baths truly purify not only your body but your mind and energy body (aura) as well. It also brings up old emotions to heal and seriously detoxes the body. I am also doing fire purification, which (since I do not have a fireplace) involves me sitting near several candles for at least an hour a day. Breathing exercises and outdoor walks (which I am kind of slacking on) are part of the mix as well. So basically, it’s earth (exercise), water (bath), fire (candles) and air (conscious breathing) purification, which is fabulous for body, mind and spirit.

What these practices also do is raise your spiritual and overall vibration much higher. In response to this and also the emotional clearing that has occurred in the past few weeks, my body has suddenly become kind of intolerant of certain foods, one being meats of all kinds… even fish seems to cause problems, unfortunately! Sugary and/or really fatty foods cause issues as well. I have however been eating dairy again, mainly organic cottage cheese. To be honest it also doesn’t seem to work overly well with my body. It has once again been intuitively suggested that I completely abstain from dairy. For some reason one of my favorite ‘light’ meals right now is organic cottage cheese with organic wild blueberries mixed in and a large serving of steamed broccoli on the side. I am willing to remove dairy from my diet, however, have not taken the steps to do so.

So yes, I completely went off the plan listed in the previous post. I did not exercise the will power and discipline, basically, to carry it through for more than a few days. I honestly and openly admit that I am still working on improving will and discipline. It’s one of my main life karmic lessons, so it hasn’t been easy!

I am now assigned two consecutive fruit days in my metaphysics class, which are either Wednesday and Thursday or Thursday and Friday. During my emotional and mental ‘breakdown’, I had trouble sticking to the fruit days. I was literally eating fast food, cheese and other comfort foods like they were going out of style. I gained maybe 3 pounds back.

Overall, there hasn’t been a resolution to my food or weight situation – yet. I am trying to focus more on the spiritual aspect of things and causing healing, purification and wholeness in my life. That’s one reason I haven’t been around to update here as much lately. It seems the more I focus on food and diet, the more it is an issue.

I hope to one day find a resolution and be able to share it with others! :) As for now, I hope everyone is enjoying the holiday season! Be back soon to update.

Rian | No comments | Tags: , , ,
28 Nov 2011
Current Diet • Food Intake • Spiritual Eating

My Current Diet

Hey all! I thought I’d do a quick update on what I’m eating these days, because I’ve kind of narrowed things down to a specific plan for the next few weeks (excluding holidays and times I’m out of town).

So, here it is:

Breakfast: Gluten-free oatmeal with organic raisins, wild organic blueberries, honey, raw pumpkin seeds and cinnamon; coffee; fruit if desired

Lunch: Some sort of fish or faux meat or a veggie burger, steamed broccoli and/or spinach, fruit if desired; baked potato or sweet potatoes

Dinner: organic brown rice with beans and more steamed veggies and/or greens mixed in; fruit if desired

Snacks: organic apples – at least 2 or 3 per day; raisins; other fruit

Liquids: 2 cups (4 servings total) of a mixture of dandelion root & peppermint tea; (helps release excess fluid retention and cleans the body); 2+ glasses of warm water with fresh organic lemon juice squeezed in (cleanses the liver!); lots of water

One fruit day per week (which will be increased to two in the next week or two. More on this later).

I feel pretty satiated, happy and nourished on this plan.

Another new practice I partake in is to eat my food with concentration. No eating in front of the TV or computer. This was a very challenging change to make, but I expect to see amazing results from it!

I will update soon about my BMI and numbers. There has been further progress made… I spent Thanksgiving up at the College of Metaphysics, and as usual, lost some weight (but gained incredible spiritual insight). :)

Be back to update soon!

Rian | One comment | Tags: , , , , , , , ,
16 Nov 2011
Realizations • Weight Issues

Weight Update & New Focus

I finished my fruit fast! It was amazing. I will definitely be going on another one sometime soon.

So, I’ve checked my weight again this morning and I’m currently 41.8 pounds from my ultimate weight goal. That weight will put my BMI squarely at 20. Currently my BMI is 26.9. (My highest BMI ever was 30.3). I am somewhere between a pant size 8 and 10 in USA sizes.

Speaking of numbers, I’ve decided to be more open on this blog about my numbers and diet. While on one hand I do not want to focus on numbers, at the same time, I know if I really want to get to my goal weight and absolutely healthiest body – which I do – some focus and real effort needs to be put into it and I need to keep track of where I’m at. Of course I’m also adding in some hearty visualization and positive affirmations.

One of the things I’m learning about weight loss and body fat is that the real work needs to occur within. (I know I’ve mentioned this more than once on this blog). There is always a mental reason why someone is overweight and overeats. This is why when people only focus on the physical – dieting, exercise, etc – they often put the weight back on. The long term success rate of dieting is dismal, to say the least! It’s because we need to go to the root of the learning and cause at hand.

In my own case, there are a couple of reasons for the excess weight and difficulty in taking it off: First of all, I’ve been keeping track of what I eat. And for the most part, I don’t really eat THAT much. (Most of the time it’s less than 2000 calories). I’ve had a sluggish thyroid and a strong inner need to protect myself. I realized last week that I have kept myself from a distance from people for years, because it feels safer. I haven’t liked getting too close to anyone (even physically, I would back away from people sometimes). I put on the majority of my weight after a painful breakup in 2007. Somewhere in my mind, I had determined that people were unsafe. So I put a literal and figurative wall around myself, through overeating and alcohol.

Then when I tried to ‘fix’ the problem with dieting and/or exercise, I failed every single time. Because the real problems within were not being addressed!

Anyway, I had a bit of a breakthrough while talking to my metaphysics teacher last week. When I admitted to her that I don’t like being close to most people and could feel an invisible barrier between me and others, she congratulated me for finally acknowledging the issue (which apparently many could see in me but didn’t choose to tell me about! Grr. lol). Since then, some of that barrier and fear of people has dissolved. Actually, much of it. There has definitely been progress made in recent days.

So, does this mean the weight is just dropping off? Not really. (Well, I did lose about 4 or 5 pounds during the fruit fast). For me, there is more… I’ve had a sluggish metabolism and (sometimes inflamed thyroid) thyroid , which I’ve learned was caused from of a lack of expressing and sharing my true inner Self. Which really goes along with my fear of opening up and being close to people. I was keeping people at arm’s length in every way possible and kept my real inner Self hidden away.

Now I’m taking steps to share my true inner Self, and while at times it is frightening, at the same time, it’s exhilarating and joyful. I’m finding when I am totally real and authentic and sharing what I know to be true joyfully and openly, it is the most amazing experience ever! I literally light up, both inside and out.

Another learning that is associated with my own weight ‘situation’ is following through on things. This was one area I was definitely not living up to my full (or even partial) potential. However, through completing the three day fruit fast, I proved to myself that I really can follow through, even when the going gets tough.

And I’m talking about following through in all areas of my life. Often times I would agree to do something or meet someone, etc, then back out or cancel. Somehow it has been a strong pattern over my life. I’m aware of it and have begun working on it carefully over the past few weeks. And trust me, this has NOT been easy! Sometimes I will create plans with someone and then not want to go for whatever reason. However, I’ve been basically forcing myself to follow through. On everything. And it’s been interesting. The great thing is that my teacher is aware of this learning and she is encouraging me and not letting me make excuses for not attending events. I realize when I do actually follow through on the things I didn’t feel like doing, something really enjoyable happens when I do it anyway. It appears I had been blocking myself from enjoyable experiences by canceling plans and gatherings.

Not anymore!

Anyway, I’m going to keep an eye on what I eat for a while and make an effort to keep myself to a disciplined calorie limit. I’m also going to continue with the inner work. I’ll keep you all updated on the progress. Right now it’s time to go take a shower and get ready… I have some Craniosacral therapy scheduled for noon today with that holistic doctor I’ve been seeing. :)

Rian | No comments | Tags: , , ,
15 Nov 2011
Current Diet • Fruit Day • Spiritual Eating

Fruit Fasting, Cravings & Peace

Hey all! Once again I’ve been a bit MIA…

Life has been pretty peaceful lately. I’m on the 4th (and probably final) day of a fruit/juice fast. A week or so before the start of the fast, I had struggled (again) with unhealthy eating. Once again my weight loss stagnated and reversed a few pounds. I started to really get down on myself, but thankfully not for long! I managed to reverse that judgmental mindset rather quickly this time because all it did was make me unhappy. Following the reversal of that attitude I was able to get myself to stick to a lower calorie intake for several days – 1200-1500 calories.

Then last week, I kept coming across people who were fasting (either juice, or fruit, etc) and many other people who wanted to. When I meditated Friday night (on 11/11/11), I received intuitive advice suggesting that I do a three day fruit/liquid fast myself. At first I felt like I couldn’t do it because I had struggled in prior weeks just doing 1 fruit day per week! However, I was willing to try.

So I did. I created an ideal, purpose and activity for the fast and kept my mind on that. And it worked! I was slightly tempted on the 2nd day, and REALLY tempted on the third day but stayed strong. For the first time, when faced with powerful food cravings, I managed to exercise will power and say ‘no’ to myself. It was very liberating. I learned something about cravings after that. I realized that anytime I get major cravings for something, I’ll start imagining how it tastes and how I’ll feel after eating it. Once I do that, it’s all over… at that point I have talked myself into whatever the craving is.

However last night (which was night 3), I tried something different: as soon as the craving hit, I immediately turned my attention to something else. I would not allow myself to ponder how those chocolates would taste. (Chocolate covered cherries is what got my attention, of all things! ) I turned my attention onto something else. And a wonderful thing happened almost immediately: the powerful cravings went away! My discomfort didn’t, however… and I realized that what I was really wanting/craving was the soothing comfort that those chocolates would have temporarily brought.

So anyway, I’m probably going to break the fruit fast today with oatmeal. I’m going back onto my prior ‘mostly organic vegan with occasional fish’ eating plan from here on out. The holidays are coming up but I will definitely not be eating any poultry or dairy. I’ve given the poultry thing an extended and thorough contemplation and have finally decided not to eat it, ever again, unless in dire circumstances. There are a few reasons why I finally made this decision. I may or may not list them here at some point.

One thing I’ve lost the need to do in recent weeks is try and talk anyone into doing anything. I see now that things are exactly the way they are supposed to be, at any given moment, and if someone wants to change the world or do ‘good’ for others, the best way they can do it is to work on themselves.

As Paramhansa Yogananda said:

Remember, whatever you want others to be, first be that yourself; then you will find others responding in like manner to you. It is easy to wish that others would behave perfectly toward you, and it is easy to see their faults, but it is very difficult to conduct yourself properly and to consider your own faults. If you can remember to behave rightly, others will try to follow your example. If you can find your own faults without developing an inferiority complex, and can keep busy correcting yourself, then you will be using your time more profitably than if you spent it in just wishing others to be better. Your good example will do more to change others than your wishing, your holy wrath, or your words. The more you improve yourself, the more you will elevate others around you. The self-improving man is the increasingly happy man. The happier you become, the happier will be the people around you.

This is the motto I am living by these days! And everything is SO much more peaceful and joyful.

Rian | No comments | Tags: , ,
06 Nov 2011
Uncategorized

Update Coming Soon

Full update coming soon! :)

Rian | No comments
25 Oct 2011
Breakfast • Spiritual Eating

Oatmeal And Still Minded Healing

Oatmeal

I’m sitting here devouring some phenomenally delicious oatmeal right now! Mmmmmmm. I prepared it with golden raisins and organic raw pumpkin seeds (pepitas) and some raw honey.

Well I have just returned from yet another amazing and healing spiritual weekend at the College of Metaphysics. The weekend was focused on being still minded as much as possible. What I realized over the weekend is that once we can effectively still our minds, miraculous healing begins to occur naturally in the body! Truly. I have been practicing and learning how to still my mind for months now through meditation and concentration exercises. It is NOT an easy thing to learn and can sometimes take many years of practice to achieve to any great extent. However, being up at the college surrounded by other still minded people and beautiful nature made it a lot easier to maintain for longer periods of time. I (and the other participants) did have to face some inner unproductive thoughts for a time on Saturday. I also had to consciously stop myself from intellectualizing about all of the experiences I was having! We began our stillness on Friday night at 11pm and continued through Sunday morning until after our last meditation, around 9:30am or so. We also juice fasted during that time which I know helped my body’s healing.

The weekend consisted of four still-minded meditations (three on Saturday, one on Sunday), led by a spiritual teacher who has mastered a still mind, meaning he can go still as often as he wants for as long as he wants. Being in the presence of someone like that during meditation causes major healing and profound things to happen. During the first session, I began to notice my head starting to move on its own. I was a little resistant at first but it persisted and my head/shoulders began gently stretching. I realized after a time that my body was stretching and relaxing intuitively and clearing up energy blocks. Not only that but a deep blissful inner rhythmic breathing began on its own. It was as though I was being breathed through Spirit. (Actually, that is indeed what was happening!)

Throughout each meditation, the stretching, moving, breathing and inner bliss persisted. Sunday morning’s meditation was particularly powerful and I experienced my Kundalini energy rising like fire through several (but not all) of my chakras. That was one of the most intense, blissful and powerful things I have ever experienced! Upon asking the spiritual teacher later why and how it happened, I learned that the stillness of mind caused it. Basically, our real and natural state is stillness and bliss. And when we consciously still the mind, our spiritual Self can take over our bodies and heal us. So, in quieting my thoughts, I allowed my body to systematically release old thought patterns that were causing pain in my shoulders and neck and other areas of the body. After the Kundalini experience, my body continued to stretch, flex, move and breath in ways that felt amazingly healing. (This has continued actually since arriving home – it begins anytime I relax and breathe deeply). My entire body feels changed after the weekend and I’ve begun losing weight rather rapidly. I feel intuitively that I released much of what was causing my body to retain excess weight and water, so it’s now normalizing itself quickly. I’ll keep you all posted on the weight loss!

Also since arriving home, my appetite has changed. I am less hungry and only interested in natural and nutritious food. I am also asking my intuition what it wants to eat and actually went shopping intuitively at Whole Foods last night. I asked my inner Self, “what should I get that will be wholesome, nourishing and healing for my body, mind and spirit?” I felt guided to pick up some clementines, organic bananas, green vegetable juice, carrot juice and some organic fuji apples along with a few other things. I’ve also slowed down my eating process, take more time between bites and concentrate on feeling love and gratitude while eating. I have a feeling that this process will completely change my body for the better, along with the stretching, stillness and healing still occurring. I’ll keep you all informed! Because if (or more accurately, when :) ) this truly causes significant weight loss only with effort on my part of stilling my mind, following intuitive eating choices and allowing natural healing to occur, I will want to share it share this information with everyone! :)

Rian | No comments | Tags: , ,
17 Oct 2011
Breakfast • Current Diet

Back On A Healthy Eating Plan

As of yesterday I’m back on a healthy food plan: high organic/natural/whole vegan eating – except Sundays, where I’ll allow myself a serving or two of fish. I’m also staying soy and wheat free for the time being (see last post for reasons why).

The doctor I saw last week gave me suggestions on how to make perfect brown rice. I took her suggestions but made a tiny change or two and the rice came out fantastic! I’ve decided not to use my microwave to cook food anymore. Before, every time I’d make brown rice, I’d use the microwave, because I couldn’t get it to come out right preparing it on the stove. However, I used a stainless steel pot this time, used more water and removed the rice from the heat earlier. The result was AMAZING rice. I combined the rice with some Earth Balance vegan (soy free) butter and organic kidney beans.

The main reason I’ve decided not to use my microwave anymore is because of one of the intuitive reading sessions I sat through a few Sundays ago (in OKC). A piece of information came through that microwaved food causes problems in the body. Some people can handle it better than others. I don’t know if I’m one of those people, but in thinking it over logically, I’ve determined that if the human body needs to go out of its way to ‘handle’ something, than it’s not the best thing one can give it to begin with!

So, once more I’m focusing on fruits, veggies, greens, oatmeal, brown rice, beans, some wheat/gluten/soy free cereals, almond milk, coconut milk ice cream products, and a few other things. Fish on Sundays. Organic as much as possible.

My body had started to feel SO amazing, light and flexible after about 14 days of vegan eating a few weeks ago and my weight had also begun dropping off more quickly. I also felt more spiritually in tune.

Today I had this for breakfast:

… along with some sliced organic mango.

I’ve also taken to drinking a 16-ounce glass of water with lemon squeezed in it each morning, as it helps clean the liver of impurities. (That was more info that came through during one of the intuitive sessions). Cleaner liver = weight loss & better health overall.

In other news, as I’m sitting here typing out this post, the ground beneath me is literally vibrating/shaking quite a bit. There has been construction going on next door for many weeks now. They are building a retirement home. It’s crazy how much the construction is shaking the ground. One positive thing all this shaking is doing is removing my fear of earthquakes. Before this, anytime I felt the ground even remotely move, I’d panic. (I grew up in So Cal and felt many, many earthquakes over the years, panicking through every one of them).

Happy Monday!

Rian | No comments | Tags: , , , , , ,
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